I am a Sexual Predator

Dear Avid Readers,
As I had the funniest (now at least) thing happen to me I thought I would share it with you...my dear avid readers. As you know, I am starting new job on Thursday, well as part of the "orientation" I had to go online, take a sexual harassment class, pass this online test administered by the computer (by at least 85%), and print out my certification of passing and bring it in with my paperwork. Well I went in on Friday a little cocky and really not in the mood to take the test. I read the first 5 pages of a 75 page online course carefully and began skimming around page 5 1/2. Most of the stuff was very clear cut...

Quid Pro Quo: Like when employee Michael is told by Employer Harry that if he wants that $200 raise he will have to bend over

or things like

Hostile Work Environment: Like when employee Michael tells very awkward and obscene jokes in the work environment and makes his fellow employee May uncomfortable

So really, I thought I had this in the bag. So after skimming through my "course" I finally got to the part where I could take the test. As I breezed through it I was feeling very good about myself. I was certain I was on the right track...I mean who could possibly get the question

True/False: In your department is it acceptable to date students
My answer: False

I mean I was rolling. After completing question 25 and I was waiting for the computer to finish "loading my results" I even looked at the kid next to me at the Chinatown Public Library and gave him a smile and wink like "yeah buddy we're good!" Well little did I know that post-wink I looked back on the screen and saw:

"I'm sorry, you needed a score of 85% or above in order to pass Pace University's Sexual Harassment test. You have failed"

and right then and there the word failed (posted in red) flashed before me in big bold dirty letters. I knew right then adn there that I have labeled myself as a sexual predator. I mean WHO fails a sexual harassment test? I have watched all those videos. The ones where they "mock" situations with other fellow co-workers. I saw the movie North Country where Charlize Theron was sexually harassed by her co-workers. How could I have failed. I mean I have known to maybe give a co-worker an occiasional

(yes it is a titty twister) but not if they told me not to! I mean it was only done as a joke! Anyways, dear avid readers, yours truly was only upset for a day or so, but I have re-mounted this hurdle and have kept myself abreast of what I needed to do to handle this challenge and I have stroked a fire underneath myself and really studied hard, and long and am glad to say that today I came, I took and I passed!

P.S. btw, the answer to the question above was actually WRONG....I mean I thought I was being all conservative saying that I couldn't date student, but looking back, I guess if I had read the online course I would have seen that in the GRADUATE SCHOOL it is okay to date! dope!